Breasts, boobies, boobs – whatever you want to call them, men love them – in all shapes and sizes. Now, before you carry on reading, let’s do a quick quiz to see if this post “How To Make Your Breast Look Bigger” is suitable for you :-
Read the question carefully, before selecting your answer. Imagine if you were running a marathon, without wearing a sports bra. Based on the size of your breasts, would you :-
a) Be unable to cross the finishing line
b) Start running but then have to slow down to a comfortable walking pace
c) Run like the wind
If you chose a), it is most likely that you were unable to cross the finishing line because your big bouncy boobies gave you two black eyes so you couldn’t see and had to stop running! You’re reading the wrong blog post love! You want to read “How To Make Your Breasts Look Smaller” – of which I cannot write about because my titties are already “small and humble” à la Shakira.
If you chose b), it is most likely that you had to slow down as your breasts started to hurt due to lack of support from a sports bra. Your bosom should be of almost perfect size. You lucky gal!
If you chose c), welcome to my world of flat pancake boobies!
Please note that even with flat pancakes, I would never be able to run like the wind, let alone run a marathon. I am lazy and unfit and my belly is bigger than my boobs! ’Nuff said!
Before I share my secrets on how I make my boobs look bigger, please may I just point out that I don’t obsess over my lack of boobage and I wouldn’t get plastic surgery to plump them up or anything. I am generally happy with my puppies and I only need a helping hand in the chest department when a fancy top or a dress calls for it. For your reference, I’m a 32A – tragic and true – but like I said, it’s not the end of the world and here’s how you can fake a more ample bosom…
How To Make Your Breasts Look Bigger
1. Padded, push-up, plunge bras are your BFF!
Shop around till you find one which can enhance your assets to its maximum potential.
2. Learn how to put on your bra properly
You may be surprised that your “back fat” may be part of your breast tissue! For the correct technique, please refer to my bra post from last week.
3. Wear two bras
Don’t be shocked! It works wonders. Put on your usual size and then a bra with the next cup size up – I do it all the time, but it can get a bit sweaty! (In the picture above, I’m the one labelled ‘breasts’ and the cleavage was achieved with wearing 2 bras!!)
4. Add extra stuffing
Forget socks and tissues – they give you lumpy uneven boobs. You want something with shape so choose bra inserts or
chicken fillets silicone breast enhancers. When I was a teenager, I used to ‘borrow’ my Mum’s disposable breast pads which she used whilst breastfeeding my younger siblings. Back in the days, these breast pads were my secret weapons!
5. Shoulders back, boobs out and tummy in!
You’ll get weird looks walking around like you have something stuck up your a$$, but who cares? At least, your boobs will look bigger!
6. Massage your boobs with chilli oil
Do your lips swell up if you eat spicy food? The same principle should apply when chilli oil is rubbed on your flat pancakes. Please note that I will not be held responsible for any injuries caused by this action. And I refuse to confirm or deny whether I tried this method to make my breasts look bigger *wink wink*
7. Try boob-enhancing creams, e.g. Rodial Boob Job
I won’t give too much away as I will be reviewing Rodial Boob Job in more detail next week but let’s just say, I was pleasantly surprised. There are plenty of breast-enhancing products out there so it’s just a matter of trial and error – but please don’t be delusional and believe that rubbing some cream will transform you and make you boob twins with Pamela Anderson – it aint gonna happen, honey!!
That’s my methods on how to visually enhance small breasts. Do you have any extra tips you would like to share and help out all the small-breasted women out there?