squeeze zits, pop pimples, squeeze spots

Pimples, zits, spots – no matter what you call them, they are one of the most unwanted vile things to exist on anybody’s face.  And for some reason, they pop up when you least want them to, e.g. first date, wedding day.  Here’s a quick quiz to see if this blog post “How To Pop A Pimple” is suitable for you.

When you get a pimple, do you :-

a)  Shrug your shoulders, dab on some anti-spot product and let it disappear on its own accord
b)  Call your dermatologist on speed dial and get the next available appointment
c)  Check it every few hours to see if the sucker is “ripe” and once it is, you pop that pimple and get a ‘popgasm’ watching the pus shoot out

If you chose a), then please click away from The Best Beauty Blog right now because we cannot be friends.  Well, we can be…but if we ever meet face-to-face and you have a zit on your face, IT WILL BE CALLING OUT MY NAME!!  And I will be forced to leap on you and pop that pimple!

If you chose b), then you are one heckuva lucky rich bitch!  And you can also click away from this post because you’ll get a professional to pop your pimple, so this post is no use to you whatsoever.

If you chose c), give me a *High Five* and carry on reading about how I pop my zits…

Please note that this is MY guide on how to pop my pimples and it is not necessarily the “proper way“, but it works for me.

The secret to the perfection of popping a pimple without facial scarring is all about patience.  Wait, wait, wait until the timing is right when there is a visible white head and then pop that sucker and get a ‘popgasm’ when pus erupts.

So here are some pointers :-

1.  I can tell when I get a zit because it starts off as a red bulge which begins to pulse.  It’s like it’s teasing me, “Ooh, guess who’s here?”  I will feel it and gently compress it to get a rough idea of the size and severity of the spot.  It’s a big bad boy if it hurts upon light pressure.  On the first day, popping the pimple is a no-no.  You can squeeze all you like, but it’s just gonna hurt.  Instead, speed up the ripening process by poking the zit every hour with unwashed fingers.  The more bacteria, the quicker the ripening process.

2.  Sometimes I will apply toothpaste on the pulsating zit before my beauty sleep.  The alkalinity and the mint will soothe the zit and in the morning, you may find the red pimple has calmed down and is dissipating.  In such cases, there will be no pimple popping  – *insert sad face*

3.  Of course, it’s natural that you want to cover up the bad boy with layers of concealer.  But I don’t like to do that because it just makes my zit stick out more with cakey concealer.

4.  Instead of letting people squint their eyes and wonder in bewilderment at “WTF is that thing on her face?“, I point it out to them.  “Look, I have a huge pimple and it wants to say Hello!”  This makes them laugh and not stare at me for the rest of the day.  Embarrassment averted from both parties.

5.  It’s Day 3 and that bad boy is still teasing you.  This is when I start using my nails to squeeze around the surrounding area of the zit.  Basically, the white blood cells are taking their sweet time to form a visible white head so this process will hurry them along.

6.  So you see the sign – the visible white point has arrived.  But I don’t like to burst it straight away because pus will ooze out slowly and then it’s over.  That’s no fun.  Wait a couple more hours because the white point will enlarge to almost the size of the pimple.  At this point, it is begging you to burst it now, please!  Smile and take a shower and be extra careful not to “accidentally” burst your zit while you shower.  The heat and steam from the shower will make the pimple even bigger.  It is now time!!!

Using clean fingers, squeeze out the surrounding area of the pimple and watch it erupt.  Props if you get pus on the mirror!  It is important to keep squeezing until all the pus is out along with some blood because if not, the pimple is not dead.  I repeat, the pimple is not dead.  It will come back to life again to haunt your poor face!  Splash some cold water on the bleeding area and apply some toner using a cotton swab.  Leave it to scab over the next few days and wait for it to drop off to prevent facial scarring.  Easy peasy, lemon squeezy!

I hope that was a useful guide on how to pop a pimple!  If you have any extra tips or pimple stories, please leave a comment. 

39 comments on “How To Pop A Pimple”

  1. this post totally made me LOL!! but i know EXACTLY what you mean…its really gross but i get the biggest satisfaction when the pus literally squirts out! *no imagery pls*

  2. Hilarious post!

    You are going to be so disappointed in me…I used to be a pimple popper but have since graduated to being a pimple lancer. I had gestational diabetes so had to test my blood 4 times a day. I have since got the all clear but I now have a packet of lances left over…and they are perfect. They are so sharp so i just nick the top of the pimple, press and whamo – pimple dead!

    I have a question for you…as a dentist, have you ever given a patient extra gas then whilst they are knocked out, squeezed their pimples???

    • @Sarah Kretchmer, Aha, so you’re a lancer! I’m not a big fan of that because I tend to lance everywhere else but the actual point I am supposed to lance!!!!

      And LOL to your question!!! But there’s no gassing patients these days where I work so no chance for that 😉

  3. Bahahahaha pus on the mirror! I consider that a triumph when that happens to me.
    Brilliant post Ling!

  4. Omg! That’s exactly what I do, but sometimes I’m impatient and squeeze when I feel it has started to fill up inside. I wish we would never get them in the first place. I’m a pro at scarring my face :/

  5. I just started breaking out and scheduled a dermatologist appointment. The injections my doctor gives me has anything gone in an hour, and my insurance covers it in full. Take advantage, am I right?

  6. HAHAHAHA. Once again, I nearly fell off my chair reading your post. This is such a funny read, it’s absolutely brilliant, honest….But seriously, I beginning to think you can be quite disgusting. 🙂 Absolutely love you!

  7. Thanks for the tips! I actually have one right now in the middle of my forehead. Still waiting for the white to come out and say hello! Usually I keep squeezing until the blood is clear/yellowish then that way I know that whole zit is dead! After the zit start to scar, I dab some lavender essential oil and rub on the scar. Lavender oil actually help fade away the scars:)

  8. I can never let a pimple go un-squeezed! I do however need to learn to wait until it “ripens”, but I just can’t control myself sometimes 😛

    One additional tip I’d add though, after squeezing all the pus and blood out, I then apply a Nexcare Acne sticker and leave it on overnight to kill all the bacteria and suck out the remaining pus. Gross but sooo satisfying.

    • @Tina, I’ve heard so much about Nexcare but I haven’t been able to get my grubby mitts on them yet. Sounds like good stuff that! And bet it doesn’t leave any scars, right?

  9. haha! i thought i’m the only one with this ‘weird habbit’. if i see it i have to pop it! will have to learn to wait for it to ripe – very often i can’t and just go ahead with the joy!

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