How To Tell If You Have Bad Breath

YEUCH!! WTF is that stench?! Someone's got really bad breath!!

It goes without saying that bad breath is a big no-no.  Here are 5 methods to tell if you have bad breath :-

1.  Forget Ass-Licking, it’s all about Wrist-Licking

Lick the inside of your wrist, wave it about in the air like you just don’t care, to dry the patch of saliva and then, smell.

2.  Smell Yo Floss

This method kills two birds with one stone.  First, you floss and then you smell it.

(Don’t know how to floss?  Watch me in action!)

3.  Burst the Bubble

Everybody has their own invisible Bubble.  I am telling you to find a random friend, burst their Bubble, invade their personal space and breathe on them.  If they recoil in disgust, it could be your bad breath or B.O.  Further investigation is required.

However, if you haven’t even burst any Bubbles yet, but you notice that ALL of your friends generally don’t maintain eye contact or turn away slightly when you talk, you have VERY BAD BREATH!  They’re gasping for fresh air and trying not to die from your bad breath!

4.  The Special Nasal Voice

You’ve burst their Bubble and they haven’t been repelled…but you notice that your friend has a special voice reserved only for you.  It’s not the special “sexy” voice…in, they sound like they have a cold when they speak to you.  They are not breathing through their nose.  ‘Nuff said!

5.  Visit Your Dentist

Dentists become immune to bad breath after a while…but if they whack on two masks drenched in menthol / eucalyptus oil to work on you, it means your breath is honking!!

Congratulations if you have passed all these bad breath tests…but the true test is to kiss me and I will let you know!!  LOL!  Just kidding!!  YEUCH!  I have kissed guys with yukky cheesy breath…!  But that’s another story.

If you have discovered that you have bad breath, please do not panic!  And please, do not breathe all over me!  YEUCH!

Let me know if you found this useful and if you want me to do a follow-up post on how to deal with halitosis.








24 Comments on How To Tell If You Have Bad Breath

  1. Sara-May
    02/03/2012 at 10:22 am (3 years ago)

    Can I past you so you’ll tell me? Hehe x

    Ling Reply:

    @Sara-May, You can salivate all over me…okay….that sounds really wrong LOL

  2. Ana
    02/03/2012 at 11:05 am (3 years ago)

    Yes please love to read your stuff about teeth/mouth health.
    I must confess I’ve been wondering if I have bad breath ever since I read your post on flossing because I can’t floss. It hurts a lot, I must hunt down the colgate one you recommended even though I cringe at the thought of trying it… just the floss passing between my teeth almost brings tears to my eyes. I hate it. I am very meticulous with brushing, although it probably doesn’t make up for it.
    Now the good news is that I have never experienced any one of the signs you describe, which is nice given the situation :P

    Ling Reply:

    @Ana, Ouch! But it shouldn’t hurt THAT much! Have you seen a dentist lately? Maybe your gums are currently inflamed??

    Ana Reply:

    @Ling, I go to the dentist once a year and everything is always fine, they clean my teeth with that thingy that feels very cold, put on some fluor and it’s done. Never had trouble with my gums, I think it must be because my teeth are very close to each other, it hurts before even getting to the gums. But next time I “visit” the dentist I’ll be sure to ask if everything is fine with my gums ;).

    Ling Reply:

    @Ana, Hurts before getting to gums is definitely NOT nice! I wonder why…? Maybe you’re using the wrong type of floss…??

  3. Natalie Stoute
    02/03/2012 at 1:15 pm (3 years ago)

    Great advice! Especially smelling the dental
    floss :)

    Ling Reply:

    @Natalie Stoute, That stuff stinks after I floss LOL

  4. Tram
    03/03/2012 at 11:21 am (3 years ago)

    Thanks for this!! >_< Now.. to the important part. How do you get rid of Bad breath?! *Requesting a part 2 post*

    Ling Reply:

    @Tram, Your wish shall be granted!! :)

  5. Eden-Avalon
    04/03/2012 at 4:27 pm (2 years ago)

    8D ~gets ready to kiss you…then is disappointed~

    Ling Reply:

    @Eden-Avalon, Kekekeke! :)))))

  6. Margaret
    10/03/2012 at 8:59 pm (2 years ago)

    Oh thank you for the first tip. Works like a charm, better than breathing into your palm and smelling it.
    Unfortunately, I think my breath stinks, but not THAT much :I

    Ling Reply:

    @Margaret, Breathing into palm doesn’t really work… but yay to not-that-stinky breath lol

  7. kristy
    14/03/2012 at 10:30 pm (2 years ago)

    hi!
    i just stumbled on your blog via twitter. You have a good writing style. Made me laugh. =)

    Ling Reply:

    @kristy, Aww, thanks Kristy :)

  8. Debbie | SmartPoppy
    05/04/2012 at 9:12 pm (2 years ago)

    This is so wrong in so many levels! lol Kidding dear :)

    I think it’s both informative and hilarious

    Ling Reply:

    @Debbie | SmartPoppy, Hehehe, thanks. That was my intention :)

  9. Chloe
    01/06/2012 at 3:42 pm (2 years ago)

    OMG HAHA the top left photo. i just found your blog, your posts are so entertaining to read! I saw your Hk Hauls, where are you from? I’m going to HK next friday :D

    Ling Reply:

    @Chloe, Hehehe, thanks :) I am from Scotland but now live in Australia. Have fun in HK, you lucky gal!