Warning : This is a long story, but it is a true story.
One day in our local supermarket…
Me : We need to buy new shower gel.
Husband : Why?
Me : Because we’ve ran out! Duh!
Husband : But you’re a beauty blogger! Don’t brands send you shower gels???
Me : Nope.
Husband : Can’t you ask them to?
Me *rolls eyes* and gives Husband the “WTF?! face” and goes to look at the shower gel selection.
I scanned the shelves to see what was on special offer (yes, I am Asian like that!) and these big bottles of Palmolive Shower Gels caught my eye. The Palmolive Invigorating Shower Gel with Pomegranate and Mango tickled my eyeballs and I sneakily took a sniff and I WAS SOLD as it smelt divine! And yes, I actually bought the same one I sniffed – I am not THAT gross
Anyway, as soon as we got home, I ran off to take a shower with my newly purchased divine-smelling shower gel. Yes, at my age, things like that excite me! Oo-er!
As it was a big 1 litre shower gel, I pumped it and pumped it to my heart’s delight and slathered myself with the shower gel till the Pomegranate and Mango scent was emitting from all my pores.
My Husband saw how much I enjoyed my shower that he decided to take a shower shortly after me.
As for me, I toddled along to my Beauty Blogging Room with my wet hair wrapped up in a turban and continued with watching the next episode of The Walking Dead. Now if you haven’t watched this series yet, GET ON IT! But it’s basically about zombies (not to be confused with Waking The Dead!) and how there are humans fighting these zombies to survive, blah blah. Anyway, the sad thing is, my Husband doesn’t do zombies so I have to watch all this nail-biting zombie action by myself and often, I will scream and shout and jump about due to hyper-excitement teamed with fear.
So there I was… Smelling like a divine goddess after my shower and bouncing on my chair watching some serious zombie fight when I felt a little tickle on my leg. But I got distracted with all the zombie action so I ignored it as tickles usually go away.
NO, NOT THIS ONE!!!
This tickle lingered for another 2-3 minutes before I finally looked down at my leg to see what was tickling my leg and F&%$ ME!!! It was a cockroach the size of an Extra Thick & Long Sanitary Pad. Not a ickle-sized tampon, but a sanitary pad!!!
Cue BIG KICK to flick the beast of a cockroach off my leg followed by LOUD SCREAMS!!!
I screamed and screamed, but nobody came to my rescue.
Yes, dear readers, you guessed correctly because meanwhile, my Husband was in the shower enjoying himself (bahaha) with the same Palmolive Shower Gel. “Wait, did Ling just scream?? She must be watching The Walking Dead again!” and ignored my cries for help.
“ARGHHHHHHHHHH!!! ARGHHHHHH!!!! HUUUUUUU-BBBBBY GET IN HERE NOW!!! HELP MEEEEEEEEE!!! HUUUUUUUU-BBBBBBBBBYYY!!!! HEEEEEELLLLPPPPPPPP!!!!!” (Please note that I don’t actually call my Husband ‘Hubby’ but I used his real name)
About FIVE F*&%ING YEARS LATER (yes I was angry!), my knight in shining armour came in the form of my Husband who was dripping wet, topless and with his nether half wrapped in my tiny Hello Kitty towel.
Husband : What is it?
Me : LOOK!!!! A F*&%ING COCKROACH MOLESTED MY LEG!!! ARGHHHHH!!!! KILL IT!!! KILL IT!!!!!!!
Husband : What? Where??
In his haste to get to me, he left his glasses behind. Men!!! *shakes my head*
Husband : Go get my glasses.
Me : No! I can’t leave until I watch you kill the cockroach!
Husband : I can’t see! Go get my glasses please!
Me : Promise you will kill the cockroach ONLY when I get back. I need to see it!! PROMISE ME!!!!
Now, you may be wondering why I was being such a paranoid bitch and that I HAD TO SEE HIM KILL THE COCKROACH but there is a reason to my madness. The first fight in our relationship was due to a spider – and the fact that HE FAILED TO KILL THE EIGHT-LEGGED FREAK AND LET THE SPIDER RUN LOOSE IN MY BEDROOM! You can read all the dramatic details here.
Anyway, the story ends well as we all lived happily ever after except for the cockroach who molested my leg – it got squished and flushed down the toilet twice! Afterwards, I went to disinfect my leg with scalding hot water and then continued with watching The Walking Dead and my Husband finished his shower.
Conclusion : The Palmolive Naturals Invigorating Shower Gel with Pomegranate & Mango smells so good that it even attracts cockroaches too. All of the bottles need to come with this warning, I tell ya!
So..what kind of shower gel are you using? Do you hate cockroaches as much as me?